A drone flying over the Basingstoke area has captured ‘spine-tingling’ and ‘disturbing’ images of a former X-Factor contestant, who had been personally built by Simon Cowell out of blonde highlights and his old Versace suits but was subsequently abandoned when a similar contestant on a rival show had ‘gone nuclear’ smashing up a famous London eaterie.
The star’s crumbling infrastructure is said to present a danger to the public what with him shouting ‘Don’t you know who I am?’ at fellow shoppers who wouldn’t let him get to the front of the queue in Poundland. The public have been warned to avoid coffeehouses-cum-music venues at Thursdays at 1 pm at all costs and to ‘under no circumstances’ let him near a Karaoke machine.
SJ Roe
